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23-Aug-2020 12:00 AM
2394
A couple of decades ago single parenting was a subject of condemnation. Even today it is an eternal topic of debate in a society like ours which is bound by societal norms. It becomes the talk of the town when a woman breaks through these rules and is vocal about her maternal instinct to be a single mother. But the times are changing in terms of many men coming forward to express their desire to be a single father and want to have children without a spouse. This paternal instinct is not acceptable and turns heads. It depicts the stereotype, hypocrisy, and gender bias prevailing in our society.
There are many examples around us that have time and again proven that single mothers are quite successful at bringing up a child in the most amazing way. The same cannot be said about men who are single dads. Society has begun to expect single fathers but accepting them will take more time.
My husband’s friend wanted to start a family. He loved children and wanted to be a father. When his marriage ended in less than a year he started looking for other options to be a father. He did not want to be remarried and went ahead to have a child without a mother. He wanted to adopt because he thought it would bring happiness for both of them. But the laws have made it is next to impossible for a single man to adopt a child. So he decided to be a father through surrogacy. Initially, his family was not comfortable with the idea and resisted it. It was an ungodly thing for them. They came in his support after learning that he would be a biological father to the child. For him, half the battle was won.
When the surrogate was ready she was impregnated and later on delivered a healthy child. This guy was on cloud nine holding his child in his arms. Though he never met the surrogate, he thanked her for gifting him, fatherhood. Yes, he was smiling and crying at the same time. The child from an unknown mother was ready to be his companion throughout his life. The little being had completed his world with his footsteps. It’s been three years now and they are best buddies.
Surrogacy has become a popular method for both men and women, to have a child and many men have turned to it, to become single fathers. It involves consultations, medical examinations, and trials. It is a time taking process and expensive too, but the end result is priceless.
Parenting is an art and one master it through practice. There are no standard parameters or set rules on how one should bring up a child. Everyone has the right to experience the joy of being a parent. Single parents could have kids happier than the kids of couples who are in a bad marriage.
We must respect an individual’s choice to be a single parent.