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23-Aug-2020 12:00 AM
2108
He was about to say that word when I said: Hush, Don’t say that word in front of kids. They are very quick at picking up words or habits from their parents, teachers, or friends.
We have two children, three and five years old. The little one has just entered kindergarten. It is a big relief for parents when the kids start going to school but dealing with it is not so easy. You have to be very observant and vigilant about what they are learning from the outside world?
The other day, while I was watering the plants in my balcony I heard something which caught my attention. Some boys were arguing at the top of their voice. Looked like they had lost some matches and one of them was so furious that he abused them. I was dismayed because this guy was hardly eight or nine years old and was using inappropriate language without hesitation. Perhaps none of them knew the meaning of the words he spoke. I was aghast and wondered where did he learn such things? He was our neighbor and his parents were well educated.
I shared this with my husband and told him that I feared our boys might do the same thing someday.
He said that I should have faith in the values we were instilling in them.
Yes confining a child and restricting his freedom of exploring the world is not a solution to the problem. Learning what good is as important as knowing what is bad. It’s natural to worry about what kids are doing when you are not around them. But they are human beings, not robots and they are bound to make mistakes. You can’t program to behave in a righteous way. I was convinced of his thoughts.
You have to be the role model for your child. Because kids emulate their parents when they are very young and as they grow up they start emulating people around them. Parents are the first teachers. You cannot preach one thing and practice the other.
One has to build a strong relationship with children and give them quality time. You might have your own way of bonding up with them. It may be at any time of the day. I often do it when they are back from school. I ask them how was their day and what they learned? And they ask me if I missed them. These are meaningful conversations that make your child feel special and loved.
Lend your ears to your child so that they could tell you everything they want to. If they tell you something good commend it, but take the time to react to something which is not right. Bring up the complicated issues when the child is in a mood to listen to you. Once he understands your point he would never let you down.
You have to choose whether you want to be a friend and confidant or a disciplinarian to your child.